Wimminz – celebrating skank ho's everywhere

November 26, 2015

Winders Ten

Filed under: Wimminz — wimminz @ 1:08 pm

I’ve been this way with every release of Windows since 1.1, and yes, I was using 1.1 when it came out….

“This way” being ooh I’m not so bloody sure about this I think I may wait a little and see what happens, after all, the version I am currently running works OK….

And before long the version I am currently running starts playing up.

Yes, pure coincidence, every single time…lol

What *is* different now is the noise has drowned out the signal, when it comes to finding out if the move from win 7 or win 8.1 to win 10 is worthwhile, or mere insanity.

What got me was the main 8.1 machine decided to hose my user profile, switch users and everything was fine, switch back to mine and you either sat there looking at a blank desktop that never loaded anything or a frozen one, and yes I tried all the usual suspects (sfc / regedits / bits etc) and never did find a smoking gun for this behaviour.

So, I have choices, daily macrium backups and so on so several things I could do- so after a bit of pondering I thought what the fuck, lets try Win10.

It fixed my user account problem, and the upgrade was it must be said pretty damn good.

Are there bugs?

Yes, one of which is if you click on “settings and “windows update and security”  the window opens, sits there for half a second and then closes, this may be a feature, not a bug..lol

The networking stack appears to be slightly random too, couple of times I have seen it unable to see other devices on the network, do nothing, come back the next day and everything is working as expected and as it should.

Being blunt I’d be quite happy to junk the lot and run Suse on the bitch, except for one problem, some of the software that I have to use to earn a crust is windows only, and no, it doesn’t work under wine or anything because an emulated windows environment won’t cut it, this stuff needs hardware and network access, directly, natively.

So here I am stuck on Win10, because in motoring terms Win7 has 300,00 miles on the clock and Win8.1 has 150,000 miles on the clock and Win10 is the brand new lease car, exact same make and model as the last two, which a whole bunch of new problems that the Mk5 and Mk6 Golf diesel did not have, but, with 500 miles on the clock, it’s still less hassle than trying to to a ground up nut and bolt restoration of the MkIV every six months.

Life is too short and I can’t be bothered.

“There is a lot to like about this new version of windows” to me is a lot like saying there is a lot to like about the new Golf, it’s true, especially when compared to the old golf with 150k on the clock, but it doesn’t stand up well to the old W124 merc with 250k on the clock.

I think the analogy between windows operating systems and car leasing plans is a good one, and I’m not talking about the legal and ownership aspects, I am talking about getting rid of the old box with 150k on the clock and getting a new box with 50 on the clock, it’s going to develop most of the same faults over time as the old one, and some new ones, but for now it is an improvement.

If YOUR version of windows is still functioning, I’d hold on for the 10.1 point release, or SP1, or whatever they call it, if not, dive in now, either way, you are probably going to be running it before 2016 is out, no matter how much you claim otherwise now, because, sooner or later, that old Mk IV golf lease car with 350k on the clock is going to piss you off to the point where you will try Win10 as an experiment to see if you can cure the problems you are having.

Mark my words.

The user experience is the same as going from a Mk n golf to a Mk n+1 golf too, all the switches have moved from where they were, so it takes you five minutes to find the dashboard dimmer controls, you still reach for the electric window buttons in the old place, the stereo is a bit better and does bluetooth a bit better, but it’s still a fucking golf, and it’s still fucking winders…

Of course what I actually give a fuck about is my data, which is why I run stablebit drivepool on the NAS box with file duplication x2 and NTFS drives … and yes, after upgrading the desktop I upgraded the NAS box too, so even if the OS gets hosed I have 2x copies of everything on NTFS formatted drives.

The other thing I give a fuck about is doing shit, I don’t run an OS, I run application software, and as long as that does what it says on the tin I am a happy bunny, when it doesn’t do that because the underlying OS is borking and can’t see network shares on the NAS or windows files explorer locks up, I’m not a happy bunny…. but as long as my data is safe I can always recover from that, just do a bare metal reinstall.

What you *should* be hearing here is the following.

1/ Golf’s / Windows versions are not built to last (any more)

2/ It’s a question of *when* things start breaking, not *if*

3/ You cannot really “repair” or “maintain” it, you can do a periodic ground up reinstall/restoration, which is just as much trouble as migrating to the new version.

Everything else is sales talk and hot air, nobody makes a W124 any more, not even Mercedes, so you can’t buy them any more, and VW can only sell you a golf anyway, and no matter what the sales shit tells you, you’ll end up with a fucking golf.

Unless you work for the company I do, currently, who have informed us that the Golf’s are getting to expensive so they will be moving to Vauxhall Insignia’s, well, y’all will be moving without me, last Vauxhalls I drove were Magnums, Victors and PA Crestas, and I ain’t driving no modern shit.

Due to UK tax laws, the three years I have been with this shower of shit I have paid in tax allowance deductions a total of £3,500 for the *privilege* of driving a bunch of Windows H^H^H^ Golf’s on company lease, and so when I quit and the car goes back that is 3 and a half grand I have paid out with sweet fuck all to show for it at the end of it.

This sounding familiar to those who you who purchase a succession of winders operating systems yet?


The flip side of this Golf / WindowsOS analogy is this.

a/ If I had paid 3.5k for my own car and driven the miles I have done in the golf’s, it would be worn out and fucked up too.

b/ If I was planning on doing those miles, I’d want a vehicle *designed* to do those miles.

c/ Good luck buying such a vehicle, nobody makes cars like that any more.

d/ if you *could* buy such a car, say a brand new in 2016 W124, it would cost way more than you could afford.

Seeing the analogy to winders yet.

Which is where I get totally fucked and claim that Damn Small Linux is the venerable Honda c90, it has ownership and maintenance and reliability for pennies, but it’s still a fucking C90, and there is some shit (software) that it just won’t do.

Upgrade to a Harley (OpenSuse) and it does a whole hell of a lot moar than a C90, but it’s still a fucking motorcycle.

You get Linux users saying the same shit I said on bikes, as in everything you cannot do suddenly becomes a virtue of being on a motorcycle.

You get Windows users saying the same shit my mates who did not ride said, as in everything you cannot do on a motorcycle is the reason to not own one.

You get truckers going “200k miles, what the fuck is that?”

Truckers = IBM mainframe in case the analogy flew by you.

Windows is shit, but it’s barely good enough shit, and this version is just as shit as the old version on paper, but in reality this version is better simply because it is newer and fresher, even if they have moved all the buttons around again, but it’s still basically shit and you are still going to have the exact same fucking problems you had with everything from Win95a chicago once your fresh install is 3 months old…



November 14, 2015

Give me head till I’m dead

Filed under: Wimminz — wimminz @ 12:39 pm

Old tee shirt of mine…

It’s a thing, had two weeks off, haven’t swung a leg over the bike yet, spent the first 10 days too busy with other shit, now it’s wet and cold and miserable, and no bro, it don’t attract me that much.

I get people telling me they would ride in any weather, don’t matter if its wet, don’t matter if its cold, don’t matter if it’s raining jihadis.

Yeah, I done all that shit, for much of my life my motorcycle was my only vehicle, and for over a year I did long distance dispatch riding for a living here in the UK, clocking up on average between 1,500 and 2,000 miles a week, and dispatch riding is going places you’d never go and getting there by a certain time, any and all weathers.

One of my abiding memories is passing the “How” building on the M6, still 3 hours from home, at 2 am, and the clock and temperature sign on the sign of the building flicked between 02:02 and -2.2 degrees C, and I had a 9 am start the next day for a run to Nottingham.

In short, probably 99.9% of my motorcycling miles were necessity rather than leisure, and it permanently fucked me for any idea that riding a motorcycle is *always* a pleasurable experience.

Invariably those who claim it is, never had to be 3 hours from home at 2 am in the below freezing (before adding 80 mph of wind chill) with an estimated 4 hour break before getting back on the bike and doing the same thing all over again the next day… 80 to 100 thousand miles a year, to earn a living… it takes the shine off.

I *can* get out there now and ride, I’ve done it for a living, so it’s not some shit about can I do it, can I still do it, no, I know I can do it, and I know it will be cold and wet and uncomfortable (even with proper gear and one piece waterproofs the road is still wet and you still get wind chill and lack of circulation and a rainy visor) and I just don’t have the URGE, not when the alternative is to stay inside in the warm and dry and do other shit (like play Fallout 4) and put it off until there are clear skies and dry roads.

Put it off until it is 100% pleasurable.

Hell, with the end of the job next year the company wagon is going back and I’ll be back to the bike as my only vehicle, excepting my bitch has a car that I can use, but she needs to drive too, and so it isn’t for my exclusive use.

And so it is with many other things, like being in a relationshit, or working for assholes, people will tell you they will jump at that shit, well, off you go buddy, more power to ya.

But lose the shaming language shit, I paid my dues, and then some, I got zero fucks to give what you think if I drive a car to the motorcycle shop to buy an oil filter for my bike.

I got zero fucking interest in riding the bike there so I and it can be seen, and so I can hang out and shit…. paid my dues and then some years ago.

There was a job vacancy going down Plymouth HD for a parts/stores “person” a while ago, you’d think they would beat a path to my door, what with my engineering experience, riding experience and HD experience over the years, so I email the guy and ask the two crucial questions.

What are the hours and what does it pay.

He emails me back and says “too many and not enough”

I didn’t even bother to reply, being able to say I work in a harley dealership and a buck will buy me a coffee, as in, prestige it has precisely zero for me bud…

Fucking cisco field engineer, same shit, go to multimillion pound companies and try to work out why they are having problems with their locked down XP desktop machines getting through the old cisco box to VPN to HQ, like I give a fuck, end of life XP / obsolete network stack / drivers / you name it.

Get cunts telling me they would kill to get my job, they would do it for less money than me, it would be so much fun and so interesting, and that there is part of the problem, management knows there is a queue of cunts out there willing / desperate enough to work for free.

Fucking 23k company car and a frankly fucking incredible 12k UK£ starting salary for an “apprentice”, who may be late 20’s / early 30’s. and they still get cunts applying, and it ain’t for the 12k, it’s for the imagined “kudos” of calling themselves a cisco filed engineer, and the idea that once they are qualified and experienced they can write their own ticket and earn 40k.

Try to tell the cunts, only assholes earning 40k doing this shit were TUPE’d in (not me) because the company *had* to fucking take them on as part of the acquisition deal, and they get all teh shit jobs, nobody gonna cry if they quit and take their 40k off the payroll bill.

Field engineering is going / gone the way of horse buggy whip makers and mobile (wooden) wheelwrights (one of my grandfathers was one) and frankly it reminds me a fucking lot of marine engineering in the private sector in the mid eighties, you could say that 85% of those that were in it were either virgins on their way in and up or has beens on their way down and out, with a small core who took it seriously and worked to standards and charged accordingly…. 100% of these were “day” workers on daily pay, wetback shit.

Talk to some guy who had a girlfriend or two when he was in his teens and apart from that just got out of a 15 year marriage and he’s finding all the middle aged wimminz so fucking hawt and sexy… bro, it only looks that way cos you ain’t ridden enough, and he will look at me and think I am past it or running low on testosterone or some shit or vaigra or what the fuck, how could I not be interested in fucking all that warm and wet meat.

It’s NEW TO YOU bro, its not NEW, there is a difference, and nowadays even NEW has a fleeting allure.

The new 2016 Triumph Nightstorm looks like it might be fun to swing a leg over and pop a leisurely 50 miles on it, but really, that’s it, and you’d have to bring it to my door ready to go, and a nice dry day, and I have no intention of buying it.

I already got an all black ’02 night train with stage IV 103″ mods, all go faster and louder, nothing cosmetic, you think I’m gonna get on that to ride to your dealership, to ride that new bike, then get back on mine and ride home?? Fuck you, I’ll ride on past, if I feel like riding that day.

This is “marketing” vs reality.

And marketing is just another word for anything and everything that is ***NOT*** reality, like hopes and dreams and aspirations and self image and all that jazz, and by definition, if it is NOT reality, then it is an illusion.

God knows, I spent enough of my life already in the pursuit of illusions, everything from the illusions of a prestigious trade and career to illusions of being a happy husband and father, most recently to illusions that this company and I had some sort of future together that did not totally revolve around shades of modern sexual relationshits where much is promised and in the early days it is all kinky free sex, and then the rot sets in and the real agenda comes out, you are there to be exploited to the maximum amount possible with the minimum compensation and consideration possible.

Where “old” is just code for “been there, done that, got the fucking tee shirt, scars, and life membership” I am just too fucking old to go out in the cold and wet to ride, and I am just too old to put up with this shit from an employer.

I’m gonna go out into my workshop with coffee and fag in hand and the heater on and run some stuff through the laser and earn me some fucking money, and run some other stuff through the laser as part of a demo, to make something you literally cannot get / buy or commission anywhere in the world, yet, for a potential punter that may drop a whole month’s company name redacted apprentices’ wages on me for a day’s work, if the demo turns out half as cool as I think it will.

I will *enjoy* that, and there is nothing finer nor more important in the world, certainly not living by other people’s expectations of what you could or should be doing.

Even if the guy doesn’t bite, I’ll have fun doing it, and I think it will be cool, and it interests me, and I’m gonna do it cos I can, and I can because I’m too old for all that corporate shit.

October 29, 2015

It’s the end of an era

Filed under: Wimminz — wimminz @ 3:29 pm

It’s now three years since I started my gig for a company that labels itself as a “channel partner”, which means I’m the meat that turns up to site in real life to liaise with all the outsourced to Mumbai techs to resolve all the internet and server hardware issues for high street and industrial estate businesses who purchase IT and comms from the big players here in the UK.

Hi, my name is Fred and I’m here on behalf of BT / Talk talk / Virgin / Kelway / Capita / etc etc etc

When I started three years ago, about one job every two weeks was a fuck up that was not completed on the first site visit.

Now about one job every two or three weeks isn’t a fuck up and gets completed on the first site visit.

I’m sick and fucking tired of all the bullshit, incompetence, don’t give a fuck mate it’s your problem now, and all the rest of it.

Got a bunch of holiday to use up and a couple of weeks in between, then giving my notice in for end of January, given January is traditionally a quiet time in IT… so the theory is I get another three month’s derisory wages for little actual work before leaving.

Did a store last week, took two visits, brand new retail store with 7 tills on the checkout and a total of 70 part time staff, 3 part timers being cheaper for a company to employ than 1 full timer, and this fucking place is relying on a fucking ADSL connection for the primary connection and a fucking 3G connection for a backup, except the ADSL connection isn’t live yet, so 24 hours before opening I’m trying to get the fucking 3G to work so head office can push all the prices and updates and shit to 7 tills and the main server…..

Cunts are too fucking tight to pay 220 a month for EFM or 300 a month for a fibre primary and xDSL backup, one 750 quid cisco 887vag, no backup router, one cheap ass netgear switch, no UPS, no nothing.

Cunts have over 450 stores nationwide.

Fucking ISP should have told them to go and fuck themselves and come back when they were prepared to buy a proper business class internet connection suitable for 2015/6, and not a bunch of shit that wouldn’t cut it for the average home gamer… but no, no client is too mean or stupid to turn away, so some cunt in sales signs the contract and suddenly 19 nested resellers of resellers all have 27 cents each to make it happen.

It’s barely working at all by any definition and all they are doing is pushing updates down the lines to a closed store, when it opens and 7 tills are trying to update central stock and resupply, 7 chip and pin machines are trying to talk to the banks, 7 loyalty card readers are trying to talk to a back office somewhere, 20 or more staff are trying to swipe in and out at shift start and finish, head office are shoving down rich text emails with huge attachments for marketing and management, and this weeks promos and sales targets, and so on and so forth, it’s going to be a fucking nightmare, and it isn’t going to get *much* better when the xDSL circuit goes live, because it’s a cheap ass asymmetric one, with minimal upload speed, not a closer to symmetric annexe M one, which costs marginally more money than the standard xDSL.


Or I go to sites and the fucking hardware is dead, so eventually 14 monkeys manage to get a replacement cisco box to site, and eventually 7 other monkeys manage to realise that I ain’t pulling no config off a dead router / firewall / switch, so they better send me a copy of the config, and then 19 monkeys have a circle jerk when they realise (code for me ringing the twats up and telling them) that they have shipped a box with a cisco base licence, and the config has features that require a different and more expensive licence, and fuck knows, that could take days to organise…..

The psychic toll of dealing, day after day, with cunts who refuse to listen to a single word you say, and keep repeating the same shit at you until you give them the fucking answer they are looking for, irrespective of fact or truth or reality or logic or intellect of any kind…

I’ll be honest, the money never was great, it was keep the wolf away from the door stuff, not i’ll book a holiday in some pacific idyll, which it should have been, but even if the money was great, it’s no longer enough… fucking company with a glasshole google style HQ full of incompetent whining wimminz who sound like they are overdosing on qualludes and prozac and and handful of ball less wonder manginas, all trying to carve out their own shitty little empires on the deck of a clearly sinking ship/t.

18 months ago I thought the bastards were just cutting back to make the profit and expense accounts look good, ready for an IPO.

Now I realise it’s just cancer, the company is dying, and it’s time for this rat to leave that particular sinking ship.

it’s like getting divorced, a huge fucking relief and weight off, to know that my sentence there is now nearing an end.

I raise a glass of beer to them, kiss my fucking ass.

September 7, 2015

The Night Train keeps on runnin’

Filed under: Wimminz — wimminz @ 12:43 pm

(lyric from Laid Back – “Bakerman”)

Well it’s been a funny old year, not that it’s over yet, but whereas a year or two ago I was in a distinct minority with my doom and gloom predictions about the economy and society, nowadays almost nobody who lives outside London does anything much other than purse their lips and tilt their head sideways, and then relate a little snippet from their own lives that kinda supports what I have been saying.

The latest one of note was a guy I know vaguely with a bike shop, included in his current stock of used bikes are a couple of clean late model twin cam harleys, both very clean, very low miles, going for around 9k, but in both cases the previous owners have managed to throw around 30k in extras at them, which isn’t that hard if you’re really determined.

So you’re looking at guys that have paid 15-20k for a bike, thrown another 30k at them to bring the total investment to 45-50k (and we’re talking pounds sterling here, not yuan) here, and then sold it to a dealer for 7.5k, so HE can sell it for 9k, so THEY have 7.5k cash which is more than the HD dealer will give you as a trade in on your no longer factory 2006 HD when you buy a ’15 model…

… and this dealer is worried, because there are yet more rules and regulations coming down the pipe from the FSA (Financial Services Authority) all of which make it even harder to get credit, to the point where the self employed won’t even get a mortgage, not unless you have something like 90% deposit.

Credit cards are a crap shoot, because the banks insist he has a merchant services account, which means ALL chargebacks get taken back from HIM, no matter how diligent he was…

… got to the point where the only way he can sell a bike on plastic is to have the cardholder turn up in person with every bit of ID imaginable and a whole bunch of household utility bills to boot, and they all better show the same name and address details, EXACTLY the same, no “John Q Smith” on one and ” J Q Smith” on another.

Cash sales, he gets a few, but not many of them about, it’s still finance city, and lots more apply than get, and it’s no longer much of a sweet deal for the dealer in commission terms.

I’m on my third and I strongly suspect last HD, I took advantage of the afore-mentioned type of modern HD buyer, the garage queen with 200 miles a year put on it and 2x the purchase price spent on engine mods, guy built himself a bike with dyno bragging rights, but ended up with a bike that he could no longer handle, and besides (I’m guessing here) those 2009 new model range rides look so schweeet… lol.

Rich boys toys…20150829_155438sml

Time was, you chucked money at HD because unless you stuffed it into a wall, you could pretty much always get your money back… pretty much.

You do the math on some of these things though, and you find owners who are spending UK£ 2.00+ per MILE on the odometer, and that is insane shit for a fucking production motorcycle… when I bought the current ride I put more miles on it in the first week than the previous / original owner had in five fucking years, yet he had also thrown so much money and engine mods at it that it no longer fitted in the category with Malcolm’s bikes.

I met Malcolm briefly years ago, a mutual acquaintance introduced us, me as someone who could help Martin recommission a harley that had been put into storage.

When I get there there is a mint 5 year old Electra-glide in the middle of the big double garage, with less than 2 miles on the odometer, and never registered.

There are also four other large lumps covered by tarps and blankets along the back wall.

Turned out about 5 years previously Martin’s folks had died, and he got left a lump sum, he hummed and haah’ed about how to invest this cash for a bit, and ended up at a certain man dealer in London, where he bought five brand new unregistered Electra-glides, which is decommissioned for storage and left in the back of the garage.

Need some cash?

Pull one of the bikes out and sell it, brand new old stock.

He actually sold that one for MORE than he paid for it, in strict pound notes terms (inflation excluded) because there is always some asshole who will buy a no longer available from the factory but brand spanking new unused and unregistered model.

I haven’t seen Malc for ten years or more, so at that rate he still has two left, and I hate to think what a patient man could get in the age of the internet and world wide markets for a brand new unused unregistered never ridden 1999 Evo engined FL’s… I know it’s going to be a LOT more than the 7.5k each he paid…. he got 11k for the one I was involved in, not a bad appreciation after only 5 years.

But there is the thing, unless it is a tool of some sort, an asset is not a thing that you use, and if you use it, unless it is a tool of some sort, it is not an asset.

I can argue that the laser and the harley cost similar amounts of money, only one of them earns money…. a second harley would not earn me any money (if I rode it) and a second laser would not earn me any more money, as the one I have is not in use 24/7.

Put the money in the bank? Yeah, that worked well in Greece and Cyprus and other places… no thanks.

Somewhere between the time I met Malc and now, I met another guy, he took a different route, life was going to shit, divorce coming up, asset forfeiture and all that, so he went out and maxed all his credit cards and bought a brand new harley, then sold it for a quid to a mate, who sold it for a quid to another mate, who sold it for a quid to another mate, who sold it to the first guy again for a quid… which means nobody can re-po it… fuck it, he was gonna lose everything anyway, might as well come out of it smiling on two wheels.20150906_193010

His attitude was like mine, you buy it to keep it and to ride it, not a garage queen, not an overclocked dyno diva, not a supposed “investment”, not a big boys toy, born again mid life crisis, or anything else.

I always had this thing, you know, the guy is there showing off his latest mega super crotch rocket, I’d lean in and ask what was wrong with the rest of the rear tyre, that he was only using the middle bit…. LRFH

Second pic on the right is my rear tyre (first pic is the bike itself, can’t believe I haven’t mentioned this bike before on here — strange shit, you know you have done something, because you “must have” and then you check, and find no, you never did…) so if I can use 95% of the tread width on an old harley y’all got no fucking excuse on your modern jap superbikes.


I just made a coffee, re-read all this, and realised that the point I was trying to make, I have talked around a lot, but haven’t actually touched on once.

The point is that a thing is what it actually is, and indeed what it actually is may vary from one individual to another, and then there is how that thing is perceived, and indeed this too may vary from one individual to another.

Your “awesome harley cruiser” may be a “blinged up garage queen POS” to me, (and vice versa) and really, that’s just a matter of taste, and you are entitled to your own choices and tastes as I am.

However, your “investment” or “asset” may not be mine, and vice versa.

The guys up above who blinged 45k on bikes that they sold within a couple of years for 7.5k could take up yacht ownership for example, it’s a similar financial experience.

The problem starts when someone starts selling yachts and harleys and whatever else, as an “asset” or an “investment”, and when others start buying them as such.

it’s all great stuff until it comes to “mark to market” time, or selling time, and you actually make a sale.

One of those 45k spent but sold for 7.5k bikes had 3.5k of custom paint on it, he’d probably have gotten 8.25k from the dealer if it had had factory stock paint on it… that’s a bitch.

Not as big a bitch as a guy who just got burned to the tune of 37k for 5 years of harley ownership (and 300 miles of “riding” a year) who THEN TURNS AROUND AND USES THE REMAINDER of his mark to market “investment” to buy another brand new harley and start off all over again…

… or a yacht….

…. or stocks and bonds….





So the dealer who started this all off, he got no long term plans, he’d love to keep and grow the business, but he knows it’s moving goalposts as far as the FSA and other things are concerned, and you can only get late model clean as fuck low mileage garage queens as long as the supply stays available, and that is your shop’s USP… so enjoy it while you can, make money while the sun shines, and be prepared to bail when the seasons change.

Me, well I’ll be happy to keep this bike to the day I die, or until I get too old to ride, so it’s pretty much never going to get marked to market (sold), so the longer I keep and ride it and the more miles it does, the better the value from the fiat currency that was exchanged for ownership of it.

It’s like the laser, the residual value is already $0.00, because I got no intentions of selling, ever… it doesn’t cost money in HP or interest, just daily usage and routine maintenance and consumables.

If you buy something with no intention of ever selling it, that thing itself becomes substantially different from buying a thing that you may one day want to or need to sell.

If you buy a house for LIFE to die and get buried in it, it’s different to buying a house that you may want to sell, to upsize, or downsize, or just move for work.1073

We, as a species, have a VASTLY greater “turnover” in ownership of things than we used to when I was a lad, typically back then people would buy one house, maybe two, in a lifetime.

A car or motorcycle would be bought and kept for ten or more years.

A stereo the same.

Hell, my old man died in the early 90’s with pairs of shoes (that were still good) that were bought new in the very early ’70’s, I’m sitting here in a one year old pair of trainers that are on their last legs and need replacing.

To many people, I’m sitting on an old, thirteen year old, obsolete, out of date harley.

To me, I’m sitting on one that is THIRTY FIVE FUCKING YEARS YOUNGER than my last one. (last pic above)

I don’t *care* what value you place on it, any more than I *care* what value you place on the current / latest squeeze (9 months so far and going strong) because they both give me exactly what I want every single day of ownership, I’m not investing and hoping for some future gains, I’m already getting so much out that every day is another win win day.


August 1, 2015

Things are tough all over, hacking life…

Filed under: Wimminz — Tags: — wimminz @ 1:12 pm

Unconnected snippets.. my company car, the leasing company is so tight they only change one front tyre, the other one has tread left, so the flat tyre sensors which basically count wheel revolutions via the ABS system see one wheel with a circumference 36 mm greater than the other, and insist there is a flat.

Quite apart from safety issues, it’s a fucked up way to save a few bucks, but like all systems, it is a system that can be hacked, come Monday morning the tyre with some tread left is going to meet my cordless drill and have a nail inserted right near the sidewall, where punctures can’t be fixed.

This is and always was the essential definition of hacking, making a system that is not designed to do what you want it to do, do what you want it to do.

Hitlery Clinton does it, when internal email systems are backed up and archived, and as Snap sang in I’ve Got the Power, if “you don’t want that” then you just use a different email system.

Work send me an email with a load of shitty attachments that I’m supposed to print and scan and send back so some third party outsourced mofo can do some security screening so I can be sent on some bullshit jobs, no fucking problem, when they ask where they are and chase me up I just tell the HR bitch straight, my fucking scanner is dead…. *they* have no intention of all the employees posting *them* hardcopy that *they* then have to scan in and save to pdf and yadda yadda yadda… this is all about externalising effort, and you hack that by making it not work in ways that aren’t even mentioned in my employment contract, much less are enforceable… what’s that, I must own a fucking scanner that can scan to pdf?   Sure, buy me one, bastards.

When / if they offer to buy me one, it better have linux drivers, or if they find one with linux drivers it better have BeOS drivers, or if they find one it better have … you get the picture.

Monkeys tend to find common solutions to common problems, when a co-worker tell me about how he deals with the fact that HQ ships routers and switches without any patch leads of rack/cage nuts in the box, he says “I steal everything spare from every site I go to” so he has enough when HQ ships a box without… (don’t even go there about asking for this shit from HQ) .. of course he isn’t the only one, *everyone* does it, which is why two things are a fact.

1/ No site has spare patch leads or cage nuts

2/ No box is ever shipped with patch leads or cage nuts

Because between the two, as HQ knows, the job still gets done, and they save 99 cents a box in parts, and don’t get me fucking started on stereotypes, IF the fucking place has a resident IT guy they will come in one of four fucking flavours, all variations on the dress like jesus / stallman / west coast hipster / apple fag meme, and they can all go and fuck themselves because none of them are capable of maintaining a decent tidy fucking rack with patch leads all labelled up and a network map on the doors, and if you can’t do that, then ya ain’t shit, no matter how fucking leeet you think you are.

*EVERYONE* no fucking exceptions, has learned one lesson and one lesson only, and that lesson is that I only care about the particular box or system I am working on, I don’t give a fuck about anything else or the system as a whole, outside of any I/O between said system and the particular box or system I am working on.

It’s the monkey thing above stealing patch cables and cage nuts from one job so you can do the next one, it’s also known as the tragedy of the commons, and it is why everything is getting creakier and less stable.

At work we have what we used to call an “asshole creeper”, after every job he rings the fucking skanky wimminz engineering die-rectum-or to inform the bitch that he has done the job and everything is cool, as a result, he is constantly getting high fived by her to the rest of the engineering team , why can’t ya’ll be like my boy Cleetus here…. now Cleetus himself, he ain’t that good, to be fair, he ain’t that bad either, just the usual slap dash could do it better if he tried but more interested in looking good than doing good shit… but, what Cleetis is, is someone who is conforming EXACTLY to the corporate environment and climbing that ladder mercilessly, and playing the skanky wimminz engineering chief ho at her own game, and winning handsomely.

Meanwhile there are guys like myself, and “Tom” and “Dick” and “Harry”, older guys, more old school, unlike Cleetus, we have NEVER taken a customer’s network hard down accidentally, and we feel no need to report directly to the skank ho chief every time we do what it says on the tin, so we get wholly ignored in the monthly high five lists, which, is exactly the way we want it, it is now a point of honour.

There is an unofficial competition between us to be the last one to get an honourable mention in the monthly missive, my scanner being dead should keep me safely behind the pack for the next month or three.

Another one is my policy of only ever replying to corporate emails that are addressed to me personally and me only, send something to the “#old farts engineering group” and I ignore it… officially at least…

So on to domestic bliss, and the wimminz wot I are fucking lately, which it has to be said (cue cries of oh noes, he done gone git cunt struck) is basically the same bitch, but she is a good bitch, and my bitch, and for all her plus points, there are some things that will forever show the differences between men and wimminz and niggerz.

So, me being a romantic old fool, I go and buy the bitch a nice new pink upright vacuum cleaner, colour aside it does the job really well, and the colour means I never have to touch it, and she for her part bought me a nice german wet and dry vac for the workshop, which I like.. lots.

So, back to the pink upright, I have told her, several times, never ever ever use it on anything except hard floors or fitted carpets, never use it on the loose carpet lying around, cheapo trailer park rug style, on the hard floors, because it sucks the edges up and wraps the carpet threads around the brush and then the brush jams and 2 seconds later the belt has burnt through, which it is supposed to do to save the motor.

Took her a week to burn through the belt it came with, so she orders two more, I fit one, and a week later she gets through another belt, this time on a boot lace.

I fit the last spare, warning her that this machine is made of plastic, and never intended to be taken apart and reassembled this often, and so two days ago she goes back over the loose carpet and does it again.

Two more spare belts to be ordered by her at her expense.


This is the essential difference between men and wimminz and niggerz, they are not capable of learning from small mistakes and experiences, and then act all surprised when the big one blows up in their face, and the writing was on the wall for months.

The corporate day job, same shit, a company populated by wimminz and niggerz mainly, the only men left are we happy few pushed out to the fringes and largely ignored field engineers, who never grace HQ with our saintly presence.

We don’t steal patch cables and cage nuts from one job to do the next because we are trying to get the job done and make the customer and our employer happy, we do it because life is too short to waste any of it on the ball ache that is trying to talk to HQ and get shit sorted.

In my own private business, she (her indoors) was recently surprised, I had to show her the workings, which were that I have had a couple of what I class as “corporate” enquiries, so naturally I padded everything by 25% and gave them an estimate, not a quote, but a firm estimate and explained how it came about to the customer.

Quelle surprise, when these dweebs both come back to me with the only thing corporate middle men do, which is fuck all to do with spec or the product or anything else, suck teeth and say everything is great, except the PRICE…. see, to sell this to the customer / end user I’m going to have to get some discount.

So I play the corporate bollocks game and make nice noises about collaboration and working together and partnership, tell you what boys, because I have a great relationship with *my* material suppliers I can get you 18% off the materials and by changing the design *this* way (making it 7.5% smaller and therefore 7.5% faster / cheaper to make) I can cut 6% off my machine time.

Nice one, they have achieved their sole objective, now they are talking about samples, purchase order for one, provided it is good enough (the only point at which the product actually fucking matters) then it’s a pleasure to do business with you, cos you make me look good buddy.

Her indoors, being a wimminz, assumed that I’d be cutting back on MY slice of the cake to get the order.

I explained that that was not an option, my laser, my prices, my way or highway, but, the upside to being wise to the wimminz and niggerz in corporate land, and playing on the fact that nobody can do basic math any more….

Say the thing you want doing is a sign 500 x 500 mm, and I charge / quote you 10.00 bucks to do that thing, ex materials, and 10.00 bucks for the materials

Then you come back to me and say that shit is too expensive, can you cut it back some? You don’t mind tweaking the design, maybe making it a bit smaller, it just has to be cheaper, 20 bucks a pop is just too much, we are looking for closer to 16 bucks a pop.

OK, well how about we make it 10% smaller? 450 x 450 mm, that do you?

Oh yes please, gimme a sample.

Well, 50 x 50 cm = 2500 cm/squared, and 45 x 45 cm = 2,025 cm/squared.

2,500 / 2,025 = 1.2345etc so y’all got a 23% reduction in material area and therefore cost right there.

And the machining time, quelle suprise, that is a fairly constant thing, in terms of square centimetres per second, sure, I BILL YOU in machine time per minute, but that’s just marketing… so a 23% reduction in area also means a 23% reduction in machine time, and machine time is where I make my fucking money, so between the 23% saving in material, and the extra 10% saving I make between what I buy the material for and what I originally quoted you in price per square meter, I can actually RAISE my effective machine time per minute rate, because you are asking for a piecework rate.

Some cunt offered ME a house for 100, 000 bucks I’d tell them to fuck off.

If they then turn around and say tell you what, that house is pretty big and grand in every dimension, big rooms, high ceilings, you’re only 1.75 metres tall, who needs 2.5 metre high ceilings, how about we shrink it all by 10%, so for example your ceilings will be 2.25 metres high?

Well, 10% off is every dimension x 0.9, and since a house is a three dimensional item, 0.9 x 0.9 x 0.9 = 0.729, so you could sell me that scaled down house for 75,000 bucks, and make MORE profit than the full size one at 100,000 (assuming construction cost scaled linearly.. it doesn’t, the savings are actually better than that)

The new eco box houses with gardens the size of a hanky are HUGELY profitable, compared to a standard 1930’s style family house, it’s a marketing lie to say they are both 3 bedroom houses and the 1930’s one at 300,000 is too expensive but the new eco box at 175,000 is a bargain, the fucking eco box should be 50,000 if that.

It was the same back in the engineering days, irrespective, pretty much, of size or scale or capacity, one 4 cylinder engine block cost the same to make as another, and half as much as an 8 cylinder.

Yet, engines were priced on capacity, the Honda 400/4 engine cost the same to make as the 750/4, the c90 single cost 1/4 as much, but the 750/4 cost more than the 400/4 because it was BIGGER.

I used to ride harleys, shovelheads and the odd panhead or flathead, could never afford a knuck, which were cool at the time, and frankly speaking the 74 cubic inch / 1200 cc engine was big enough for any cunt.

Now you can buy 1600 HD and 1800 and bigger jap clones, the engines are still twins, so cost no more to make than an “old” 74 cube, and the sole “advantage” is bigger is better, especially on the price tag, … I know, I rode early 100 cube stroker S&S Harleys, they were in every way inferior to the 74 cube engine, if you only care about it being an actual motorcycle engine that does nothing but power a motorcycle, and ignore the penis envy shit, torque figures you can’t ever use, etc etc etc

Out back I’ve got a lowly 1,000 cc v twin, it’s been in bits for years, but frankly speaking even if it wasn’t, it is “enough” for a motorcycle engine… if it isn’t, then adding cubes is NOT the answer, you need to start subtracting something else, probably the asshole lard quotient.

I came into this piece with hacking life, and that all gets a lot easier if you keep your scope small and compact and lean and mean, back in the harley days I used to do a lot of FT (foreign touring) and camping, and camping on a motorcycle means a COMPACT and lightweight 2 man tent, a thin but good ground pad for under your bag, and a good quality compact sleeping bag, THAT WAS IT as far as environmental shelter and shit went, none of this shit about need a bigger tent.

You can still, just, buy some good old school shit.

If you don’t have one of these, buy one now…. as for personal recommendations, I’m only on my second one in 30 years.

July 14, 2015

Signs and portents

Filed under: Wimminz — Tags: , — wimminz @ 10:25 am

I see them everywhere, but then again, so does everyone else, it’s pattern matching, what lets us see shapes in clouds.

I also see that some time in the past several years I’ve gone fucking gray, and I’m not talking the odd gray hair here and there, I’m talking most of them seem to be gray, my fucking chest hair is largely gray, my beard stubble is largely gray, my fucking pubes are growing out gray.

Over the same time period my skin, notably on my face, has gone from youthful and smooth (fnaar fnaar) to leathery Charles Bronson spent too long in the sun squinting down the sights motherfucker TEXTURED shit… don’t mean lines, mean texture…. what the fuck..lol

So, I guess it’s official and undeniable, the telomeres have spoken, y’all ain’t no spring chicken no more.

Someone said some years ago that the markets can stay irrational longer than you can stay solvent, but looking at the ongoing Greek fiasco and the state of economies and so forth makes me think, irrational exuberance is just as looney tunes as irrational panic.

Markets and politics and shit today seems to have more in common with reddit memes and popularity than anything even remotely related to real world shit, but surreal shit is getting ever more surreal.

In the day gig it seems we as a company have lost a lot of competent and experienced engineers, they have quit and moved on to pastures new, probably bored with being paid peanuts, I guess the inference being that since I haven’t quit I’m not that competent or experienced…lol.. I certainly never get mentioned in the monthly shouts to all the high fives above and beyond teacher’s pet accolades via email from da management..

… but today I notice one of my oppo’s has a meeting scheduled with the department heads and some apprentices, first I fucking heard of it, so someone somewhere clearly made a policy decision to keep yours truly well away from the fucking apprentices… can’t say they were wrong…lol

Meanwhile back at the laser shit, yeah, I could make a living at that shit now, it’s picked up organically and sans any kind of promotion or effort outside of a website, to the point where it could just about keep me alive… so considering it’s been only nine months since I bought the bitch and haven’t really pushed it in any way… a pleasant surprise.

It’s also been a couple of months for the silverstone nas box / asus h81i / wd red 6tb / stablebit drivepool / win 8.1 nas box, and I am having to admit that in every way it is exceeding my expectations, lovely little bit of kit… bear in mind the day job involves dealing with all sorts of corporate IT, not just routers and switches but also servers and storage kit, some of it very high end and very fucking expensive, and that shit just ain’t *that* much better, if at all, save for variations around the fact that it has to support many more users, which in itself has problems with added complexity and therefore reduced reliability.anonymised

The shit I am seeing in the corporate world is symptomatic of the decline.

Going to jobs where the network ain’t working because some cunt has done the BYOD day thing and plugged a cheap shit router into the network, which promptly starts broadcasting DHCP addresses to everyone one else on the network, in competition with the separate range DHCP advertised by the corporate router.

Going to jobs where teh (sic) switches are pegged at 99% CPU utilisation because (see pic) some cunt in patch cable hell has managed to path in a hard loopback between devices in the rack where there should be none, or where every port is patched in and the fact is the device itself is now working at capacity because nobody has any notions of bandwidth management per application type etc.. I mean, we all really fucking NEED rich text email and shit, with massive boilerplate sigs full of corporate branding images and other bullshit.

I just sent a fucking email to myself, from my corporate account to a personal one, I used a while fucking EIGHT BYTES for the subject and message body, the rest was “blank” or as blank as the boilerplate templates allow, and I didn’t even use any fancy fonts or font colours or anything, and what landed was a fucking whopping 236,909 bytes in size.


At 9,600 bps and allowing a 15% overhead for transmission protocols 260599.9 / 9600 = 27.14582291666667 —— so 30 seconds to send on an early modem, and the rule then was if your fucking corporate web page took more than 15 seconds to fully load you were fucked and drowned.

Fuck me I have a copy of my entire business website from 1999, multiple pages, sections, downloads and all sorts, and the entire fucking website is 1.9 mb, I really splurged out with a very fancy and bling bling logo that was 27,256 bytes, with a snazzy background texture that was a whopping 6,263 bytes and a home page html document that was a bloated 6,754 bytes, and I can remember agonising at the time whether it was all a bit too “fat”…

You want to know one of the most useful tools in my bag when I go to one of these places to do any work?

1″ masking tape.

I can label every patch lead end individually, I have to, because there is no network map and no colour coding and no cable labelling or marking of any kind, none, nada, zip, zero, zilch…

And I’m the only cunt in my company that carries masking tape…. and we are industry leaders… but keep me away from those fucking apprentices at all costs eh, might corrupt the poor bastards…

be afraid, be very very very fucking afraid.


July 11, 2015

Pull my finger

Filed under: Wimminz — Tags: , — wimminz @ 11:39 am

I see this in the day job, in my private life, everywhere I look…

*this* being the “I have done enough, I cannot be expected to do any more” attitude, the flip side of which is “The system is still functioning, therefore I can push it harder and get more out of it“.

It applies everywhere, from the mundane and humdrum details of everyday life and such basics as paying for utilities, to international geopolitics, and everything in between.

It’s an attitude fostered by a generation (or two) who have never witnessed, personally, and up close, what happens when the system in question destabilises and ceases to function.

Let me give you some examples.

In my private life I live in rented accommodations, my electric utility is provided by a large utility company that supplies the building, they have my name because when I moved in three years ago the landlord’s agents gave them my name.

Like all utilities, there is a meter for this electric as it enters the property, from there it goes to two coin operated put-a-coin-in-and-pay-for-your-electric-in-advance meters installed by the landlord / his agents the rental company, one for each section / floor / tenant.

So when the utility company threatens me with court action to enter my home and seize my shit and install a coin meter because *I* owe then 1200 bucks, *I* turn around and tell the rental company “not my fucking problemo, I already paid for all my electric in cash up front in the meter, which YOU empty… but, it’s gonna be YOURS in 7 days if this isn’t sorted, cos I’ll issue a writ

Any same person would think this would get it sorted, because who needs or wants to be party to a lawsuit, especially an unwinnable one like this.

Naturally enough we must all be insane, because that’s what I’m 48 hours away from having to do, and no likelihood of a last minute resolution.

Expecting the other guy to blink first when you threaten them doesn’t tend to end cleanly when the other guy is too fucking retarded and incompetent to blink, they are too busy breathing through their mouth and watching “ow my balls”….

The landlords agents, (the landlord) the utility company and the utility company’s appointed debt collectors do not see the simple fact that I have and have always had a pre-payment coin meter as a MAJOR fucking problem for them all, there are 1200 bucks missing from the system and this is the hammer we always use on all these nails and we are TRYING to help but really, our hands are tied, and frankly, you’re not helping us to help you, you need to do this and this and this and then I’m sure we will eventually get this all sorted out.

So I get to issue a writ, and I’ll take the shotgun approach and name all of the above, and sue them for protection from harassment and for enforcement of my legal right to the peaceful enjoyment of my own home and for protection from threats of bailiffs seeking monies that I do not owe, and I take the shotgun approach and name them all, as otherwise there will be squirming and finger pointing at whoever is NOT named as being the guilty party.

Given that I have always paid in cash in advance for my electric via the advance payments meters installed by the landlord / rental agency, given that the agency has admitted in writing that I clearly have paid for all my utilities and clearly am not in arrears and clearly do not owe anything, given that the law states that any course of action that comprises two or more consecutive incidents can be classed as harassment and I’m being phoned daily by the debt collectors, given that the law guarantees a tenant the right to peaceful enjoyment of their own home while the bills and rent are paid up, it’s about as cast iron slam dunk a lawsuit as you can get.

That is the kind of lawsuit I like, and the only kind I bother with, the legal equivalent of put them all in a field and bomb the bastards and let god sort it out, or in this case, the presiding judge.

Of course, despite my urging these people to talk to their legal teams some days ago, the legal teams will only SEE any of this shit when the writ lands on their doorsteps, at which case the shit will hit the fan, and everyone will try to limit liability, which is tough when it is plain for all to see that there is plenty of liability to go around, and the plaintiff in the case really is the only innocent party.

It’s a slam dunk, so it’s a no brainer for the judge to order the utility company and the utility companies bailiffs to stop harassing me and to remove any records on their system saying I owe them any monies… and for the lettings agency to adhere to the law and enable me to live in the peaceful enjoyment of my own home… and so on…

But who will get sacked?

Nobody, of course.

Nobody at all.

You can’t sack people for breathing through their mouth when the entire fucking culture for the past 30+ years has been to hire people who breathe through their mouth and throw every other fucker under the bus.

So while I might well get my individual situation remedied, the culture remains the same.

And that, of course, is no accident.

The Dice guy in the video above does another one, JFK was shot yesterday, and another one, Oswald shot Jesus in the 1300’s, and so on, and so on.

The problem is, I’m now getting old enough, it’s not just the fucking proles that are retarded, it’s spread upwards like osmosis and now most of our so called pillars of society like engineers and doctors and lawyers and judges and bank managers and cops and managers and entrepreneurs and so on are also fucking retarded.

The working title of the Enron documentary was “The smartest guys in the room”, and it really isn’t that hard to be the smartest guy in the room any more, and it doesn’t really matter what the room is, or where it is, or how big it is, or what purpose it serves.

There is a line in Cisco configuration files, it comes towards the end of the config (bear in mind, I’m not cisco qualified or certified or any of that shit, I just do this shit day in…) and it deals with line vty 0 4

line vty 0 4 is what you telnet into from a remote location.

A typical one will look like this.

line vty 0 4
privilege level 15
password 7 (passphrase)
login local
transport input all

Two ways to break it are to insert a line about access-lists near the top, because of course the remote admin trying to get in is never included in the access-list, and changing the last line to “ssh” or “none” instead of “all”

Yet, so far in 2015 all I am getting is going to sites with preconfigured routers that have such errors, or being given configurations to fix things that have such errors, all of which mean that the problem I was sent to fix, remote admin not being able to access the router, don’t get fixed, unless I exceed my culture and fix it.

Of course, one the the things about cisco is this…. any change I make to the config of a running router stays in the volatile RAM ONLY, until and unless I do the “write memory” command to write the currently running config to nvram where it becomes the startup config.

The not so recent case of the american municipal sysadmin who was up on hacking charges, well basically you can put the config in RAM only and never write it to nvram, so when someone local to the router restarts the router to bypass the login credentials, what reboots is a blank box.

I had this discussion with a very qualified cisco guy yesterday, he was bemoaning and deriding draytek kit, which I like and rate and use myself, particularly, he was saying it’s shit on draytek because every-time you make a config change the draytek insists on a reboot.

He-ll-ooo I said to him, this is DELIBERATE, so it’s not a sign that draytek kit is shit, it is a sign that draytek makers knows users, and that includes network admins, are now shit.

Yes, it means you cannot experiment on a live fucking system and not use the wr mem command and end up locking yourself out, and not panicking, because all you have to do is ring the client and ask them to power cycle the router, because it will then reload discarding all those changes and you are back where you started.

It means if you lock yourself out you’re locked out until someone with local physical access changes shit, no more hiding, and you think this is a bad thing?

Draytek also go the “non human readable binary blob” config file route, not the human readable text file cisco route, so no password recovery, you factory reset the bastard to a blank box, and again, you think this is a bad thing?

Physical access to a cisco = root, so the only way to get any security is do what matey did in the states, and many still do, never write the config to nvram, because the only way to do that is in plain text.

Physical access to a draytek = the ability to factory reset it… and even if you manage to extract a config file from an archive somewhere or email attachment, it’s a binary blob, not human readable.

Cisco IOS of course came from an era when the people designing it assumed that the people using it would not be fucking retards, which is why cisco shit is so fucked up in 2015 in real life, too many fucking retards with “enable” access.

Draytek comes from the modern era, when the people designing it assume that the people using it will be fucking retards, you don’t get to fix shit on the fly, you get a more binary experience, that shit is either right, or it isn’t.

Draytek *know* that their shit is “edge” stuff, not “core” stuff, so they know physical security will be minimal at best, cisco don’t care, core or edge, it all assumes there is good physical security, and if there isn’t, which there never is at the edge at a user’s premises, mm, well, too bad.

The old school *assumes* that there is a network in place, which you can then use to tweak and fix and configure said network, draytek stuff *will* do that, after a fashion, but mainly it is built around the idea that you do not use the network to tweak and fix and configure said network, you either have a local guy on site set up the config manually, or you ship a binary config blob, or you ship pre-configured, and pre-configured better be right, or else.

It’s like using railways to build and maintain railways, vs using service roads built along side railways to build and maintain railways.

Guess which model my utility bill conundrum fits into, using modern management and procedure and accounting methods to build and maintain modern management and procedure and accounting methods, or having a back service channel that only ever gets used for “whoa, this guy is already on a prepaid meter, we need to pull this out of the management system where it will just loop around flowcharts until the dude drags us all into court, before this guys drags us all into court….”

June 29, 2015

Greek Roundabouts and Swingers

Filed under: Wimminz — Tags: , , — wimminz @ 12:30 pm

So, while still being a recidivist misogynist bastard, I got a regular squeeze that often stays over, so this morning as she is off to work and I have a later start, she comes back to the bedroom after getting washed and dressed and ready to leave, and gives me a morning blow-job.

You literally can’t get that morning blow-job if you are hard-line MGTOW and kick the skank out at midnite after emptying your balls into her….

***irrespective*** of the merits or perils of being hardline MGTOW or having the bitch stay overnight, the significant factor here is you can’t get the morning blowjob if you kick her out at midnight and retire to your bed alone.

It’s 100% either or.

Greece (and most of the rest of the western world) is like that, or at least it is as soon as you stop with the bullshit and delusions and live now pay later kick the can down the road defer the bill as long as fucking possible while still stuffing your face at the all you can eat buffet.

Once the music stops and the light go up it’s back to reality, and either or.

But there is reality, and then there is everyone’s opinion on what is reality, and opinions are like assholes, we have all got one, and most of them are similar, but separate.

So far nobody has commented on the fact that the Greek reality happened on a Saturday the 27th of the month, typically just in time to NOT pay everyone’s wages into the bank on the last day of the month (Tuesday 30th this month)

How convenient for TPTB.

How inconvenient for the proles on the street.

So let me tell you a few things about ATM’s, I work with these things, but I don’t work for a security firm filling them with cash, if I did I’d have been programmed to freak out with secrecy and not discuss any of this with outsiders.

Think if a BIG office printer, the kind where there are multiple drawers of bins holding the feed paper, you’re kind of on the right lines, now securityify the thing up, rigid steel frame, panels, doors.

Doesn’t actually need a print head, as the paper in the bins is pre-printed, so it’s only a question of dispensing 5 sheets from the 10 bin when you ask for 50 etc.

round the font you have a flat screen and some keypad and buttons for the user interface.

round the back there are more keypads and stuff so the security droids can get it to unlock the empty drawer cartridges and accept the full ones, after inputting the correct codes and personal identifiers and codes of the day / week etc

And then there is the internet connection… of course the ATM uses this to check with your bank that your card is valid, and that you have 50 available to withdraw, and then tells it you have done so, and your new balance is applied to your account etc.

The ATM of course also uses this to report on its own health, intrusion detection operations, software and firmware updates, code registry updates and so on and so forth.

No internet connection = “We’re sorry, this ATM is not available” message on the front.

As to what they hold, the typical full size machine can hold easily in excess of a million in cash, they can hold a few millions actually, if you get one that is chock full, which means one that has just been filled, which also means one that all of the drawers and cartridges are used in.

Let’s say it takes 60 seconds for a complete user cycle, lets say each user can draw 250 bucks / quid / euro / fecalcoin notes, that’s 250 x 60 per hour which = 15,000 an hour, over a 24 hour period that’s 360,000, over a 7 day period that’s 2.520 million, and they really need to go a week or two between refills…. and you usually have two together, so customers aren’t “inconvenienced” when one is down for maintenance etc

Obviously the guys and gals filling these machines are carrying around several million in cash every day, but it isn’t loose cash, it’s in these tins or cartridges… hell, inkjet ink is the most expensive liquid known to man, but nobody actually HANDLES the shit with bottles and funnels and pouring and so on, in the same way nobody actually HANDLES the cash.

THAT is done behind high walls and closed doors and rules that you can take your cellphone and car keys and credit cards with you, but ALL cash and coin stays in your home, you don’t even have any in your car which you drive to work in.

Because essentially nobody is trusted, so these steps all serve to remove every single individual from temptation.

So, if you have a “Greek” event…. all you have to do is send an update via the internet to all your ATM’s, don’t let anyone draw more than 50 if they are greek or more than 100 if they are a bloody tourist.

It’s no different to an ISP sending a throttle command to the modem they provide you with for “free”, or a suspension of service command to the radius server that lets you get access to their network, or a fuck you go use this proxy instead of a direct connection.

You see, it’s simple programming, provided you have the computer power floating around somewhere, you can do the following.

1/ Take all unique personal account customers of natbarcloyd banks details, and use those details to create and populate a new database of customers of the new nationalised natbarcloudstatebank

2/ set up a cron job to push 100 newbucks a week into each account

3/ allow every user to draw up to 20 newbucks a day from the ATM

4/ send a command to every ATM to not dispense anything from any cartridges still tagged as containing euros

5/ send G4s out with newbux to replace the euro in the ATM’s

it’s literally a 24 hour financial coup that CAN be implemented from the top down, if you have access to the correct level of coders and security types, you’re talking a group of maybe 50 people can MAKE this happen and push it out to the masses.

It’s like my morning blowjob, in the either or sense, you either hand a banking system that allows this shit, in the system sense, or you have one where it is impossible, and if you have one where it is impossible, you don’t get your morning blowjob, ever.

Letting the bitch sleep overnight is letting the bankers / state impose / use a fiat currency, it’s either / or.

Back when I was  lad, the technical definition of inflation was “an increase in the money supply”

If there was one billion pounds of money in the system (doesn’t have to be all banknotes in a fiat monetary system, digital credits count too) and you increase the supply to 1.1 billion then you got 10% inflation.. end of…

Fractional reserve banking and loans are therefore inflationary by nature.

Here in the UK we have 60+ million people who think we are independent, because we use the Pound Sterling, not the fucking Euro, wherever it is printed.

They all forget, we USED to have Pounds, shilling and pence, 240 pence to the pound, or 20 shillings of 12 pence to the shilling, then we had “decimalisation” and an ENTIRELY NEW currency of 100 new pennies to the “pound”, but it was still ***called*** pennies and pounds, so nobody reacted to it like a name change from say drachma to euros.

Of course, this was all “before records began” back in the late sixties, the fact that it was in living memory is neither here nor there, now we have a constantly moving goalpost of “when records began”, see, that’s another way of changing the playing field, changing when your records begin and discarding all the older stuff.

Since records began in 1996 not only have house prices not risen *that* much, but the Mongol hordes under Genghis Khan haven’t invaded anyone at all, bastards still go on about my armed robbery and murder convictions throughout the seventies and eighties when I was a gangland kingpin though…

Which all brings me neatly and disjointedly to a local swinger “couple” as in they aren’t a couple and don’t live together but for the purposes of swinging they are a fuckbuddy couple, as in, she only comes as part of a couple, but he meets on his own, and she does not ever, so don’t ask, or it will offend, fnaar fnaar.

So they get pissed off when I say Fuck you I’m not interested in you as a couple unless she swings alone with me, and when I point out that ALL I AM DOING is imposing upon them, that which they seek to impose upon others, it’s toys outta da pram time.

And that’s the grexit in one sentence, when the Greeks try to play turnabout is fair game, it’s a bit like the Russians and Putin being labelled “aggressive” and “escalating” and “warmongering” for noting that all those NATO bases are within 100 miles of Russian borders, and none of them are within 1000 miles of USA borders, or the Russians deploying a mere 40 new nuclear missiles, some decades after Bush II administration said fuck you and walked away from Nixon’s 1972 limitation treaty and started building new nuclear missiles.

That shit isn’t an unfortunate CONSEQUENCE of an asymmetric system, the fucking asymmetric system is chosen mainly because it has those fucking properties, that is the whole fucking idea, shit runs downhill, asymmetric systems exist to define the direction of the slope.

I get a nice blowjob and not a slit throat or an empty wallet in the morning BECAUSE the relationshit is asymmetric, she does not hold the power and dare not fuck it up, and all that keeps that shit clean and lean and clear is the fact that the one with the power does not abuse it.

But then, I got morals and standards, despite the fact that my claimed total lack of morals and standards of any kind is always the first refrain of everyone who tries to manipulate me and make me their (too meek and timid to stand up for themselves) bitch.

Hey, no worries, the “contagion” from the greek collapse and exit is planned for and contained.

Now, who wants a blowjob in the mornings, OK, form an orderly queue and vote here…


June 7, 2015

Crunchy Frog and Krispy Kreme

Filed under: Wimminz — Tags: , — wimminz @ 12:12 pm

Most of you know my day job, for those that don’t, my day job is installing or repairing main-street business internet connections, either on the premises, in the local exchanges, in data centres or in the network operation centres.

I got a pocket full of ID saying I am from all the big players, depending on the job and site and who I am representing.

When I say “business” I don’t just mean high street shops, I do military bases, traffic lights, police stations, water works, schools, children’s homes, motor factors, electrical good suppliers, basically fucking everything that is *NOT* a home broadband / internet connection.

I’ve talked here before, extensively, about how flaky and piss poor it all is, but I know y’all don’t REALLY get it… you’re not nearly scared enough… so, hold that thought, and hold what I typed above, while I do a little detour…

A detour into documented vs undocumented.

A documented change is a change that is ordered or recorded in documentation, and anyone else who has access to that documentation is therefore aware of it… eg  “I have replaced the twin 30 ampere breakers with a single 50 amp breaker” and I did this because your wife’s new mega cooker would trip the 30 amp breakers on full load, the downside is you USED to have one 30 amp breaker on your mains socket ring main, and one on the lighting and ventilation circuit… so you USED to be able to trip the socket ring main one and work safely on the sockets and mains gear in the basement while still having the benefit of mains illumination and ventilation, not any more, now it is all either live, or a dark cave.

If you don’t know when you walk in, or when you specify new kit, like the 40 ampere cooker…

In the day job, it usually concerns IP addresses and ranges, and there are only so many to go around, and no tow devices can have the same IP address…

..or rather, they can….. I could in theory put a box on the backbone and give it the IP address, which is Google, so you have, effectively, two separate boxes on the internet, both of which are in effect saying “I’M Spartacus!”

The problem is, when you connect YOUR box to the net, and you want to talk to Spartacus and ask where you can find a webpage that will tell you how to wire up a hifi loudspeaker crossover circuit, how does YOUR computer know which is the real Spartacus?

In reality, because your request has to be ROUTED through so many intermediaries, all of whom know who the real Spartacus is, it’s not much of a problem.

(windows users, press Windows key and R simultaneously, a box will pop up, type “cmd” into the box and press enter, this will bring up the console… type “ping” and it will tell you how long took to respond to the ping request, and the TTL time to live for the ping request.. all good fun, now type “pathping” and be patient for up to three minutes… this command will list all the noted or hops or boxes in between you and spartacus, and after a delay, how many packets each one of them dropped… very useful windows command that has been in there since the XP days..)

So… in the world of BUSINESS network connectivity, things are different, it’s more like there is the internet, and there is the 10 laptops in your own home on your own LAN, except they don’t talk to each other JUST via the router that sits between your and the internet, as in laptop01 > home router > laptop02, but each request goes VIA the internet, laptop01 > store router > internet > store router > laptop02, and laptop01 and 02 may or may not be in the same physical shop.

So we have sites with 950 physical bricks and mortar addresses, and maybe 85 different things connected at each site, and shit isn’t working at site number 157.

Sometimes, you get in a place where you have to stay on the job until it is fixed, eg until site 157 IS working, which means it can talk to HQ (site 001) and a few others, and so on.

Sometimes, according to the documentation, what you have *should* work, but, it doesn’t… somewhere there is a setting that isn’t what you expect, of course that could be anywhere, not just on the corporate VPN, could be in the ISP / provider’s routing tables… who knows, you don’t and you have no way to find out.

Some times, you can look at it and say OK, they have 950 stores, so I’ll just make an imaginary store number 951… change these settings just so, aha, bingo, it works.. but you DARE NOT DOCUMENT what you have done, because according to the documentation, the documented set of numbers and details should work.

Possibly the reason they don’t is back when the company only had 945 stores, someone thought they would fix a problem by making imaginary store 950, who knows.

Real hilarity ensues when you make a mistake and tell the box in store number 949 that it is Spartacus, not knowing that store number 236 also thinks it is Spartacus, because this is a business connection none of the other stores including HQ at store 001 know which is the real Spartacus, so anything can happen, from traffic getting broken up and routed to both 949 and 236, to what should happen, HQ, store 001 saying “I don’t trust either of you bastards” and kicking both store 949 and 236 off the corporate network until a technician (like me) can get on site to sort it… tens of thousands of dollars an hour down the drain, cash sales only in both those stores for the duration.

Real real hilarity ensures when someone makes store 949 think it is Spartacus, and in fact HQ store 001 is supposed to be Spartacus, you can take all 950 stores offline with that one…


Of course, this is what all the ISO / BS / six sigma and other bullshit is supposed to prevent, everything is documented, but the fact is if you want everything documented, you have to document it, and then design a computer record system around THAT, not what happens, which is to tweak the documented system to that it fits the computer programmers design and code.

Which means there is a LOT of scope for undocumented shit, because if it is undocumented, there is no way you can blame employee payroll #628 for doing it….  which is why employee #628 made fucking sure it wasn’t documented.

Between THAT, and shit just falling through the cracks, eg work order was generated for a telecom guy to turn up on site and install a VDSL/FTTC NTU network termination unit / socket, guy turn up and does this, nobody told him it should not go here with all the other stuff that comes in from the street cabinet, but in the comms room 4 doors down the corridor, and nobody told him to install a VDSL modem as well, or even if they did tell him, nobody made sure that there was actually a spare mains power plug anywhere near the new install site to power the VDSL/FTTC modem… you get the picture, between these falling between the cracks sorts of issues, and the undocumented shit issues, you just about accounted for 98% of all issues.

Thing is, my day job EXISTS to put out the fires caused by this 98% of issues, I am a full time fireman, and I am always putting out fires in the IT infrastructure, because there is always something somewhere on fire, and there is a never ending supply of new fires being started because of shit falling between cracks and undocumented shit..

So now it has become the new norm… people in the industry and joining the industry have never known anything except a hideously complex ghetto with guys like me running all over it on our insectile feet putting out fires… of which there are always thousands…

I mean, I get on site, there is flammable material everywhere, and you are all sat around smoking and flicking your dog ends everywhere, and you actually expect me to give a fuck when YOU clearly don’t?

In the past THREE FUCKING YEARS, do you know how many sites I have gone to where there was a printed network map fixed to the cabinet door?

It’s a smaller number than the number of sites I have gone to with a clean and tidy and professionally racked and cabled cab, and that is about three in total.. the first number is zero by the way.

NORMAL is getting on site with a new router, because, you know, the problem with your old EFM service wasn’t all of the above, it is that it wasn’t fibre, so we will upgrayeed all this shit for y’all, and significant expense of course, it’s an exercise in upselling, not remedy… so there I am, fuck all documentation apart from a postal address and and end user name and a telco name, it would be nice to know the circuit ID I’m supposed to be connecting to, or the LAN switch port, but fuck that, the cisco command “sh int desc” *might* tell me, assuming I know the login and pass, assuming the monkey that wrote the config bothered to put such REM statements in, assuming that even when they have it is more informative than “GE0/1 LAN – GE 0/0 WAN”

When I work it all out it still doesn’t work, because you have an ADVA box that is providing 100 meg fibre bearer and a Cisco box that someone has written in the config for GE0/1 “speed 100” which won’t work, because the Cisco box is talking to a non-Cisco box, so it just sits there with a dead circuit, so if I have the login and pass I change it to “speed auto” and bingo it just fucking works, write memory, another undocumented change, not a biggie as these things go.. but another brick in the wall.

Fuck it, I get my forms signed and I’m outta there.

And if y’all think there is ANY part of modern civilised life that does not just stop fucking dead when the internet connections for it go down, y’all just haven’t been paying fucking attention.

And baby, when push comes to shove, it’s the arms of the state that will get connectivity second, the multinationals like google and fuckbook and the banks and major supermarket chains first, infrastructure like traffic lights and water plants third, and as for your home broadband, you’ll come last, and by that I mean y’all will get FUCKING limited connectivity on an ad-hoc basis to one or two proxy services only… as in AOL walled garden days, port 80 http traffic and throttled at that, or sweet fuck all.


June 6, 2015

I don’t *have* the fucking answers.

Filed under: Wimminz — Tags: — wimminz @ 1:23 pm

It’s like that line from the early part of GTA-V where Michael’s kid says “My mum used to be a skank…

I *used* to shit in my daiper, I don’t any more, and so it’s sort of acceptable both because it was decades ago, and also because *everyone* else did too.

I *used* to drink drive too, fewer decades ago, and not everyone did, and I really do not expect everyone to find it acceptable just because it is in my past.

But it gets complicated, today,  I’d rather someone turned up to collect me from the railways station smelling of booze than with pants full of shit, the drunk can get in the passenger seat and I’ll drive home…. fecal freddie can stay in the car with the windows shut, I’ll get a cab…

But when someone becomes “unacceptable” because of an act they have done, well, world’s change…

My main employer became unacceptable to me last month, not in the sense that I jacked the job in, but in the sense I stopped giving a fuck, so despite still doing everything contractually required of me, I’m no longer going that extra mile and using the cerebral ability and experience and common sense that frankly speaking they weren’t fucking paying me for anyway…

I still get a 100% completion rate, as in 100% of my jobs get all the paperwork signed and sealed and some fucker gets billed and no come back on me, but my actual *success* rate, where the end user is back online and all the staff can update fuckbook etc, that’s fallen from about 60% to about 35%.

I am effectively HALF as effective as I was, just because my employer did one thing that I found unacceptable to me, and yes, I got it remedied within 72 hours, but the cunts should never have done it it the first place, tried their best not to remedy it when I raised it, only did so when I threatened legal action, and of course never issued an actual apology, as they are still convinced that they are in the right…. after all, I’m just a lowly fucking wage slave.

My day job is effectively now easier, because I give less of a fuck.

Her indoors noted all this, and several pieces of jigsaw fell into place, the shit I have been telling her about only giving someone one chance to fuck up as an answer to the question of why a wonderful guy like me was single when you met me bitch, everyone else did what my employer did…. differences between my employer and skank ho ex cum buckets is my employer is still fucking paying me, that’s why I stay with the bitch.. lol

It’s a fucking learned response, she is now applying it herself to her life, and finding all sorts of “nearest and dearest” that have been near and dear for upwards of twenty fucking years are actually just unacceptable skanks of one form or another, and only got away with it because of some label like “Employer” or “Brother” or “Mother”, as though these are excuses for less than exemplary behaviour, as opposed to being reasons for best possible behaviour and practices at all times…

In the “night” job things go on slowly and steadily, but this week I was treated to a series of emails from three different senior staff members from a local company that makes shit out of acrylic asking me to quote to do X for them.

There have been about 20 emails back and forth, and I still don’t have one or two fundamental and crucial design issues answered, but I do now have a fucking purchase order… don’t have the shit yet, just the purchase order, I guess it will take another three managers a week to organise sending me that shit… then they will come up against the fact (stated on my website) that I don’t do credit or 30 day terms or account terms or anything except payment on collection, payment on shipping, or cash with order if I am buying materials too… which will no doubt take another three managers another week to sort out…

They apparently have two lasers in house, one of which is on the blink, and I *believe* that the timescales and cost of fixing the dying one has made them shit themselves, so it looks like it is like the company I work for in the day job, fucking expensive products / service, but allegedly to world class and all sorts of big name customers, big fancy expensive premises, and bunch of managers on big salaries, and a handful of actual workers on fuck all money who don’t give a fuck.

Her indoors is thinking I may be on to a good thing, when they work out that outsourcing a portion of their production to me will be cheaper for them than fixing their laser.

Me, I’m not convinced, I am already working for one set of assholes in my day job.

I don’t need another set for my night job.

Especially as, as predicted by me, the mythical kickstarter job that was going to allow me to retire early in three month’s time is -crickets-

That and a buck will buy you a coffee, it’s a good mantra to live by.


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